Are you sick of the same old same old when it comes to dating and relationships? Meet Emily Chadbourne from That Crazy Little Thing Called Love.
Emily is an f-bomb dropping dating coach who is about as raw and real at it gets when it comes to both business and finding epic love. She talks frequently about how the work she does is about getting real with clients so they can get real with themselves... It's frankly refreshing. When Jemimah and Shevonne came across Emily, they just knew they couldn't live another day without having her as part of the business real blog series. If anyone is going to tell it to you straight, it's Emily. Read more below for her take on what it's really like experiencing a real day in the life of a dating coach. You can also see more about Emily via her website here:
"When I was approached to write this article, I must admit to delusions of grandeur. I imagined myself as the English Carrie Bradshaw living in Australia. In my fantastical mind, I’d be writing this at an open window, the Melbourne breeze blowing the muslin curtains around my beautifully framed face which is of course, glowing with a gentle tan and kissed by the morning sun.
But here’s the reality.
I’m in a pyjama onesie, on my sofa, with unwashed hair and its approaching midnight.
Because this is about the Business Real, right? So with your permission, I’m going to share with you the messy, crazy and not so graceful reality of a day in my life as a dating coach and founder of That Crazy Thing Called Love. I warn you now, it’s not always pretty!
Every night I set an alarm,
And every morning I snooze the crap out of it.
Sometimes it’s just 15 minutes; on a cold morning up to an hour.
I’ve read that snoozing is a colossal waste of time but I like to ease into my days whenever possible. I use my time in this slumber to visualise the completion of my goals, be grateful for my unbelievably comfortable bed and message my closest friends to wish them a beautiful day. This morning ‘ritual’ is important for me. – it’s connects me with myself, my vision and my tribe – I love my friends.
Coffee is a big part of my life and I drink my first cup in bed once I’ve hit a conscious enough state to boil water safely. While I do this I check social media.
Facebook is a huge part of my business and my main marketing platform so I start interacting and networking before I even brush my teeth.
And then…I think about going to the gym.
I’m not a graceful exerciser but I drag my sorry arse into Exercise Studio 1 wearing the t-shirt I wore to bed and looking like something from a zombie apocalypse at least 3 times a week. I got flabby a couple of years ago and didn’t like it. So I changed it. And those endorphins are pretty awesome too!
My reward upon returning home from the gym? Another coffee as I shower and get game ready.
I work from home so it’s can be an effort not to put sweat pants back on after my morning shower. But my Grandma always used to say, “if you’re always ready Em, you’ll always be ready.” So I take the time to put my face on (even if it’s just BB cream and mascara) and style my hair – You never know who you might bump into at your local supermarket (although undoubtedly when I bump into Brad Pitt I’ll be buying tampons!)
My average day consists of client calls, interviews, marketing, HR-ing myself, accounting, project management – with the exception of IT, I am every department in my business.
So it’s tough for me to describe how a working day looks exactly.
But I will tell you this.
I get easily overwhelmed so I try to keep to just 3 new projects at a time.
I work on these along with general business admin, pretty solidly from 11am until around 3pm and then I tend to pause because honestly, it’s around this time that my brain melts.
I used to resist it and try and power through but now I make a conscious effort to work from a space of inspiration. And I’m never inspired at 3pm. Ever.
Instead I use this time for what I do best with little energy – people.
I chat on the phone to members of my business tribe (who are awesome and the tribe is growing), I meet networking contacts for coffee because, coffee! And also because relationships are key to how I generate business and honestly, relationships are how I enjoy doing business.
I tend to graze throughout the day (read, eat continuously) but always have dinner with a friend. This solves 2 problems.
1. It means I have some kind of social life.
2. It means I don’t have to cook. Because I can’t. Like, at all. Like, seriously!
I’m usually home by 8pm and will happily work solidly into the evening until I’m out of inspiration or my laptop overheats!
That about sums up a typical working day for me, but I’d like to add a couple of things which are important in my REAL of business.
The first is this. There are always boxes of tissues in my work space. I never used to be a crier. I thought it to be the sign of breaking point and distress and Goddam it, I WASN’T STRESSED!!!!!
But as I’m evolving as a business owner and as a human, I’ve come to embrace tears. They are a release of emotion, an expression of what’s going on in the body and soul and one of the most bloody satisfying things to do on a shit day. Or a great day for that matter.
And lastly, I’ve made a conscious effort of late to make time for meditation and mindfulness in my day. I resisted this for a long time because honestly, I thought it was all a bit wanky. Nice and all that, but really – come on. Who has time to sit on their arse for 20 minutes and think of nothing? Not me!
But as I’ve made friends with my feminine (she’s such a babe) I’ve been much kinder to myself and more focused on the present.
A great friend once said to me “Em, everything is perfect, now.”
And it’s stuck with me.
I have seen such a shift in my relationships, my business results and my happiness since giving myself space to quieten my internal dialogue so I can tune into my true self.
It builds real self-trust for me and I actively encourage my clients (and you) to do the same."